#6 Surviving The Chili Cook Off

The Chili cook off is an annual event at most churches. It's a time where all of the parishioners get the opportunity to go head to head to demonstrate their ability to cook a pot of Chili. Each participant may be cooking the same style of food, but only one will  take the title of "Chili Champ", only one will take home that coveted blue ribbon. I personally love the Chili Cook off, I'm a big fan of heat, and some would even say a glutton for punishment. With that said, if my tongue hasn't developed blisters, then your Chili isn't hot enough and you won't be getting my vote; sorry but that's just the way I roll.

Even though we all enjoy the opportunity to taste Chili, and take in some good Christian Fellowship, I think one of most peculiar things is seeing the drop in church attendance the following day. This sudden drop only leaves one to guess if maybe those missing parishioners had eaten a little more Chili than their tummy's could handle. With that said, we need to be careful of which Chili's we eat, and for the most part, the name of the Chili should be your first clue as to how hazardous your little cup of beans could be. So in an effort to keep your head above water, and keep your butt in the church pew instead of letting out P.U. here is a short list of 10 actual Chili names I've found that pretty frankly sum up why we should steer clear.

1) 2 Flush Chili
2) Red in, Brown out
3) The Broken Plunger
4) One Bowl Leads to Another
5) Near Death
6) Where's the Air Freshener?
7) The Colon Cleanser
8) Out Of Order
9) The Permanent Laxative
10) Holy Rollin' my Butt is Swollen


Which one is your favorite? I have mine, but I won't tell (Number 4). Chili Cook offs are a great way to fellowship, and they offer a great opportunity for us to invite our friends to our church event without them feeling like your cramming God down their throat. Let's just beware of what we're cramming down our throats in the meantime. Let's eat well, praise God, and love on each other at the Saturday Chili Cook off, then let's get a good night sleep so we can show up to church proudly stating that though we ate and ate a ton of Chili, we indeed survived the Chili Cook off.