I've always enjoyed the time that I spend in quiet prayer. It's an opportunity to talk with God, and focus on all that He has done for me. In addition to the quiet time that I have with the Lord in the privacy of my own home, I've also come to enjoy the Silent prayer time that we have at the Church.
Weather the pastor gives us time to silently pray during worship, or weather it's at the afterglow following the service, corporate quiet time is beautiful. But I've noticed that as much as we can enjoy our quiet time in the church, it's during these quiet times that the church speaks in ways we normally wouldn't hear while the music is being played loudly, or the preacher is preaching their message. It's at these quiet times during service that we hear all kinds of things; individuals outside of the sanctuary gossiping, we hear kids running in and out of doors, we hear kids getting spankings for putting gum in each others hair, and we've even been disturbed by the parishioner who couldn't wait until after the service to have a very loud holy rollin bowel movement just 25 feet away in the restroom.
Now we'll give this individual a little credit because they didn't know that everyone would hear him/her, nor did this person know it was prayer time; they were in the rest room, making room for the traditional all you can eat Sunday Brunch. Still it doesn't change the fact that when that back door opens, everyone is going to turn around to see who it was who interrupted the prayer with a rupture of flatulent sounds. So how can we avoid this embarrassment? Here are 4 things that I've come up with, and please post more ideas in the comments if you have them.
1) Close the bathroom door
Some multi person church restrooms have those doors that always stay open. Sure there's enough privacy between the foyer and the stalls so nobody can see in, but if you're needing to have a bowel movement while service is in session, it may be a good idea to test those hinges, and close the door. Sure the usher may come by and try to open it back up again, but when he hears whats going on, he and many others will be sure to leave you alone.
2) Wait until after service
Okay I know that this is an obvious antidote to avoiding the embarrassment of bowel sounds being heard during church prayer, but seriously. Why is it that we can't wait? Is your home out of toilet paper? Or are you just interested in reading the church bulletin which is conveniently posted on the back side of the stall door. What ever the case may be, waiting until after service, or better yet until you get home, may be the perfect fix to keeping your BM from becoming a part of the service.
3) Watch what you eat the day before
We used to eat Buffalo Wings every Saturday night...we don't do that any more! Eating spicy foods, or anything that upsets your stomach before church is just going to set you up for disaster. If your tummy is easily upset by fatty foods, do your church a favor...stick with a low fiber high protein diet on Saturdays.
4) Use the kids bathroom
Okay this is kind of a cop out, but if there is nothing else you can do, and you have to go, then why not let the kids church listen to it. They'll not only think it's funny, but you'll become a hero to many of the little boys who can only hope to be able to make sounds like that come from their own bodies.
Scripture tells us that God desires for us come to him in prayer.
Ephesians 6:18 says "And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints."
1 Thessalonians 5:17 says to "Pray continually"
Colossians 4:2 says "Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful."
Prayer is an awesome time that we have to be intimate with God. Whether you're in a silent church prayer or praying in the bathroom, God desires your conversation with Him. Let's just do our best to keep our bowel sounds to a minimum for the sake of the rest of the congregation and their time in prayer.
J.R. Prainito
No comments:
Post a Comment